The worst part is the little sting....RIGHT.

Today is my best friend's 18th birthday. She is so special to me. Everyday I'm proud of the woman she's become and will continue to grow into. Welp, yesterday was pretty horrible. Actually I'm just referring to the part where I had a tube run through my nose and down my throat. Yeah, not fun. I went in as calm as possible. I mean, how bad can it be?? They sprayed my throat (which had me gagging BEFORE they even started feeding the tube through), swabbed my nose; both to ensure I was numb in those areas. Well I wasn't numb. At 1st the tube stung a little but it was definitely bearable. She told me to let her know when the tube was in the back of my throat. Words weren't necessary. My gag reflex and the vomit that followed was a pretty good clue. The tech would stop when I gagged, wait for me to regain control, then try to move the tube again. This was just strenuous and rather repetitive. What I needed was for her to push the tube down regardless of my body's need to clear what it thought was choking me. The other tech decided to take over and informed me to just swallow as much as I could and she was going to just keep feeding the tube further down until it ended up where it needed to be. We finally got it in place about 10 minutes later. That's 10 minutes of constant gagging and throwing up and coughing. Then it was easy. Sip water, swallow. Sip water, swallow. Repeat until it's been done 10 times. Then out came the tube. I felt so traumatized. Never in my life have I been so shaken up over a test. Honestly, I thought this would be a cake walk compared to some other stuff (like 23 tubes of blood at 5 am)...but I was sorely mistaken. Note to self: Do NOT wear make-up when doing a test like that again. My whole face was covered in black streaks and all my foundation was gone. Completely. My entire face swelled and it looked like I'd been crying for hours. I was completely wiped out after that. I had a ridiculous headache and just wanted to sleep. My mom and I left and I got groceries. Sadly, this is a task I can no longer perform alone due to my lack of air. Afterwards, I went to pick up the little from daycare and from there we met up with my friend, Kassandra and her friend Meghan, and grabbed a bite to eat. We went to Khanki. Mira was pretty happy with it this time. She stood up in my chair and would yell "I SEE IT!!" in reference to all the smoke when the chef was cooking. She was still a bit unsure of the fire, but she didn't cry. Miracle ate about half of my rice (which was a TON because I didn't get veggies. Meaning I got extra rice.) Kassandra wanted to walk around a little after, so I took Mira to the little kiddie ride area. She would walk up to one ride and act as if she wanted to get on and then say "I don't want to ride." Needless to say, it got a little frustrating. I finally was able to coax her into a helicopter WITH me. That was a funny picture. I'll try to load it. Then it was home with mommy, movie time, then bedtime. Twice she fell out of bed and just had a fairly restless night's sleep in general. I was absolutely exhausted today. I spent the day resting as much as possible. My lung function seems to have gone down. My chest is getting tighter and tighter. I'm almost positive it's time for antibiotics again. Monday I'm getting my g tube replaced with a g-j tube (finally). It requires an overnight stay and more pain in the tummy area. Yippy. I just keep reminding myself one day it will all seem small compared to the amazing life I'll live after my new lungs. It will be like being reborn. I'll think of things in relation to when I got transplant, not in relation to my actual birth. What a marvelous time that will be! Love to all.